The Poetry Org

Jesus Wants To Make You A Millionaire

We know that he
worked as a carpenter
until
he gave it up to
travel
tell stories
and generally
piss off people like me

We know that he
was a homeless man
without
his own bed
he relied on the
starry sky and the four walls
of friends and strangers
for brief moments of solitude
and rest from it all

We know that most of his
close friends ended very badly
either
tortured and executed
for association with the Jew
or
exiled to a distant island
plagued by terrible visions
in old age

We know that he
was not a social climber
managing
to make powerful enemies
whenever he opened his mouth
he turned to the broke
dined with tax collectors
walked openly with hookers
sat too close to the sick
talked too long to the criminal

We know that he
was sold down the river
by one of his best friends
for around
twelve thousand

That he
spent his final years
on the run from the government

That he
turned down the desperately
hoped for plans of a Coup d’etat

That he
talked more than anyone else
about unfashionable things like hell

That he
willingly rode to his execution
on a borrowed ass

And yet we still believe
that
Jesus’ main objective
through his hard living
and bloody slaughter
was to make you a
millionaire

To make sure

That your life is
as comfortable as possible

That your kid
attends the right college

That your mortgage
is paid up

That your portfolio
is properly diversified

That your career
moves from success to success

That you are given due respect
for your efforts

And finally
that your confidence
in the Dollar, the Euro and the Yen
is so complete that it
blots out
any need
you may have once had
for his
presence

- by Robert Bruce from his collection, “Make The Devil Fumble His Wine,” available here (PDF download).